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Thursday, May 31, 2012

Here Kitty, Kitty

I need to share something with you guys. I have laughed this morning..and I want to share it with you.

Back story first: I have a cat. Hang on. We have a ca.. …… My honey has a cat.

The cat is ok. I’m not really a cat person… but my child and my honey obviously can put up with them much better than I can. So… there is Marcel.

Marcel grew on me rather quickly. He really has acted more like a dog than a cat since we brought him home. This made me like him a little easier, and not want to kill him all of the time. The little fart even fetches. Now, Honey has him in training to stand on his hind legs like a human… and walk. He’s getting there… slowly…

Now, his training will more than likely be put on hold for a while, seeing as I have him scheduled for a visit to the “no more babies for Marcel ever” doctor in the morning. Thus… the result of this story.

We begin at work. A lovely day. Things are going by just swimmingly. Until I start to have this sticky feeling on the bottom of my foot. Not my shoe… my Socked Foot. It’s beginning to stick to my heel, and it’s rather noticeable.

Hang on. I forgot one tiny bit of relevant information….

This cat has always been a rather decent, law abiding citizen…Until this past weekend. Something happened to him and he went absolutely insane. He’s been growling at people, and hissing and just being down-right cat-like. It’s annoying.

Sunday evening… he felt the need to mark his territory in my nice (freshly carpeted) walk-in closet. I don’t know if any of you have an idea of what male cat spray smells like… but just think of stale ammonia and magnify it by ten thousand… then… I can attempt to start explaining to you what male cat spray smells like.

Animals don’t do that in my house. CATS especially.

So… the spray has been neutralized, and the cat has been locked out of the bedroom for 4 days now. He is NOT a happy camper.

Back to present day. I want to share with you the conversation I had with my honey just a while ago.


Me: Your cat put something in my shoe. I just now realized it because whatever it was, I have now squished and it is making my sock stick to my foot in that one spot. And it is quite annoying. After further inspection it seems to be the remains of a small critter or maybe an area in which he used as toilet paper. I am very angry at your cat right now…You are both very lucky that there is such a distance between him and I.

Honey: Teach him a lesson: have his balls cut off.

Me: I would like to cut them off myself!
With scissors.
While he watches.

Honey: Remind me to never poop in your shoe.

Me: I am afraid because of why I should have to remind you of that.

Honey: I regard the rules of society as merely guidelines.

Me: We will get along just fine.


 Say… “I’m so sorry, Marcel”

Friday, May 4, 2012

Everything is personal, if you're a person.

I hate to return after being absent for so long with a preachy blog. But, I have been thinking about this lately and if I don’t write about it, I’ll continue to think about it.

Years ago, I heard the most profound phrase, and it has stuck with me all of these years.

“Everything is personal, if you’re a person.” 

For those movie lovers out there, you can probably cite which movie and what actress that originated from. Regardless of its origin, it’s something to think about, and something to remember.

I used to be part of a certain internet forum. I decided to take my exit a month or so ago. I still creep in and out when I think about it…just to check in on the few people there that I do actually care about. Something has happened recently with the majority of the frequent posters. There has been an obvious separation there; with some migrating to form another forum, and some bouncing in between the two.

Regardless of the reasons or the deciding factors, there has been an increase in child-like attitudes recently and I find it incredibly distasteful. When we get our feathers ruffled, it’s so eye opening to go back and actually think about what we said and how we acted during that time. Sometimes, it’s downright embarrassing. Hind sight really is 20/20.

If I had the chance to say one thing to them all, it would be this: I constantly hear it preached that, “the internet is serious business!” It’s a constant, running joke among the technical community. I’m sure if you’ve been involved with the internet for any length of time, you’ve read it before. It’s a phrase that has caught on just like any other fad and it’s slathered in sarcasm when it should be respected, and seen as an individual label.

I know exactly what most people think about when they say it. And, it’s true. The majority of the public take things too seriously. People are too uptight about some things. Absolutely.

But, whether you believe it or not; it doesn’t matter what you’re dealing with, everything has an impact on you one way or the other. You can’t tell me it doesn’t. People have lost their lives, their families, their jobs, their friends… all from the internet. Do you deny it? So, why is it that when someone seems to be getting their feathers ruffled, we feel the need to brush it off and treat them as if they are just being silly about a simple joke or opinion? Does their life mean so little to you? When we log in to the internet, it doesn’t matter where we go, or what we do. …we are actively taking time away from our everyday life. Your family is put on hold, your chores are put on hold, your entire existence is transformed into a life that exists in a series of numbers and algorithms. To some, this life is more precious than their actual living, breathing existence. How absurd.

Some people really do need to grow up. Some people need to read the definition of respect and sit on it for a little while. When someone has invested years of their life into a character, it is not your place to blast their true identity to the world. That is a personal choice, and you have crossed a line of respect and simple human dignity.

I know that half of the people reading this blog will be confused as heck, and I’m sorry for that. I just really needed to get this out so I could move onto something else in my head to think about.

People never cease to amaze me. I am constantly surprised at how some people can act sometimes. But, I do know this… never pick a fight with an idiot. They’ll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience every time.

 Respect is something that has long been lost, and is on the edge of extinction. If you can’t respect those around you, how do you expect your children to? If you can’t respect someone, because of some random reason…remove yourself from interacting with them. If you can’t remove yourself, then you’re going to have to deal with it the best way you know how. Just remember that you’re an adult. People will remember the negative things before they remember the positive…and remember that everything is personal, if you’re a person.